I’ll never forget the conflicted and horrible sensations of leaving C. at preschool for the very first time. Even though it was only three measly hours, one day a week (all I could stomach at first), it was as confusing as dating boys was in junior high. Mommyhood has this way of quickly throwing you back into a foggy what-am-I-supposed-to-be doing place. Emotion mixed with hormones… makes for a toxic little cocktail splashing around one’s head.
Thoughts like…
Will he be okay with out me? What if something happens to him? What if he thinks I’m gone forever? Does he feel abandoned? Should I turn around and pick him up and take him home? You come here right now! Mommy will never leave you again!
Are mixed with…
What’s that heavenly sound? Is that… is that silence? Wait a second! Let me double-check… but I think it’s possible that NO ONE is touching me right now! OR talking to me!
And before you know it you’ve actually accomplished one entire task. Even if it’s simply sweeping the kitchen… it feels like getting a law passed through congress most days. Sure, I used to be proud of producing a news investigation, but now.. in my new world, I want to open the front door and scream, “I JUST CLEANED A TOILET! And now I’m having a cappuccino!”
And at exactly 20 minutes before pick up time… it happens. Butterflies dance in my stomach, then a flip-flop of the heart. It’s time to pick up C. and I can’t wait to see his sweet little face!
So it was after a few months of learning this dance, that it happened. A splash of cold water to the face! His teachers tucked a reminder note into C’s backpack about something called “Summer Break.” What the? He’s 2! He doesn’t need a break? How can his teachers need a break? I know I don’t need a break. We are all happy here with the system. NO ONE NEEDS A BREAK!
It happened anyway. And after several road trips, swimming lessons, crafts, baking projects and spontaneous adventures… when the first day of preschool arrived, I reeeeally missed him. I wasn’t ready to send him back to school at all.
And so another summer arrives… and I’m working overtime to make it HUGE. My goal is to feed C’s ever curious brain with knowledge wrapped in adventure. Our first stop? The Ocean! (Not the real one. The one we’re making.) A month-long journey that includes lots of new books, crafts, cooking, field trips, science and more. I’m blogging it every step of the way and pinning it too!
Please join us!
Here we go…
Anna